(ed: sung to "Happy Wanderer" and bears a striking resemblence in part to the second verse of the 'Walrus and the Carpenter' - ah well.)

When I was a little girl,
I had a little thing,
And if I tried I could get,
My little finger in.

Finger in, finger in, finger in,
Finger in, finger in, finger in,
My little finger in!

I've grown into a woman now,
My thing has lost its charm,
And I can get five fingers in,
And half my fucking arm.

Fucking arm, fucking arm, fucking arm,
Fucking aarm, fucking arm, fucking arm,
And half my fucking arm!

Now my age is ninety-two,
And I'm half fucking dead,
Now I get both arms in,
And half my fucking head.

Fucking head, fucking head, fucking head,
Fucking 'eeead, fucking head, fucking head,
And half my fucking head!